Jack at 5 1/2

Jack turned 5 1/2 yesterday, and he is so excited about it.  I can't believe how big and grown up he is getting. 

Right now, his current obsession is with Legos.  It's funny, we've had Legos in our home for years and years.  He's always liked them all right, but this month he has really gotten into them.  For his last birthday, he got a couple of sets - one that builds a police helicopter and another that builds a fire engine.  We have literally had these for over six months, and only just this weekend, he suddenly decided he wanted to put them together NOW.  Since then, he has been poring over the little catalog that comes at the end of the assembly instructions (very clever marketing, you Lego people) and fantasizing about having various other play sets to put together.

His interest in wild cats continues.  He's decided he likes cheetahs even more than lions right now, although that has mainly manifested itself in "playing cheetahs" when he is with his friends.  This typically consists of all the kids crawling around on all fours, growling and occasionally swiping at each other, while filling the traditional family roles of Mommy, Daddy, Big Brother, and Baby.  Jack usually wants to be the daddy.

It is both endearing and annoying how quickly he forms attachments to the funniest things.  It's sweet that he can get so excited about things, but it becomes more of a hassle when he starts getting very rigid about having them.  Birthday goody bags are frequent sources of this particular phenomenon.  He will usually get at least one cunning little tsotchke, which probably only cost 5 cents, and decide that it's his new favorite thing and that he needs it around all the time.  The problem, of course, comes when he carelessly sets it down someplace and then somehow it becomes his parents' responsibility to help him find it on pain of a tantrum or inability to get to sleep at night.  *sigh*

Speaking of tantrums, we've seen a bit of a regression in this area for Jack in the past month or so.  He has been doing great all year.  Everyone has remarked on how mature he has become and what a long way he's come from the most challenging times we've had with him.  However, lately, when things don't go his way, he will do anything from pulling extravagantly awful pouty faces to actually going on full crying jags.  This can be caused by something as trivial as my telling him that it's time to go home from a playdate or a friend (or sister) not wanting to play a game he wants to play. 

And of course, when more serious things occur, he sometimes loses it altogether.  It has been a frequent source of frustration for me that he can't just let things go or give people the benefit of the doubt.  If he gets bumped by another child, he immediately assumes that the other kid deliberately set out to hurt him.  When he gets hurt, he will frequently just sit or stand where he is and have a screaming crying fit.  It's not even like he is hurt and bravely trying to hold back the tears.  If he were doing that, I would be able to forgive a few tears.  But he stands there, screaming, waiting for someone to come out and see what's going on.  I get so frightened thinking about him doing this at kindergarten.  I don't tell him so, but I fear that there is going to be one bully kid who is going to think it's funny to see Jack cry like that and who will set out to make him do just that any chance he gets.  However, I have friends with kids Jack's age who say their children are going through similar emotional upheavals, so hopefully it is just the age and a short phase.

We were conjecturing that one of the reasons for the heightened emotional drama is possible anxiety/anticipation of the upcoming school year.  We registered Jack to start kindergarten in the fall.  He will be going to a school that will teach him to speak Mandarin.  It is an awesome opportunity, and I think he's really excited.  I was afraid he was going to be nervous that he won't know anyone else or understand the teacher when he first goes to school. It is an immersion program, which means that 80 percent of the curriculum is taught solely in Mandarin.  That means that he won't understand a word the teacher is saying for the first several days of school.  When I asked him if he was ok with that, he said he was because he understood that he won't be the only one who doesn't understand what she is saying.  I wish he could be that pragmatic about everything.  Still, I wonder if there is some unspoken or unrecognized anxiety that he is expressing in these crying fits.  Or he could just be having crying fits because he's five and he's Jack.  Who knows?

Regardless, before we take the leap to kindergarten, we need to finish his last month at preschool.  I had Jack's parent-teacher conference yesterday, and the teacher raved about how well Jack has been doing in all areas - social/emotional development, motor skills, and cognitive ability.  She especially said that she was impressed with how important his friendships have become for him, to the extent that she often finds it difficult to pull him away for one on one instruction because he always wants to go back and hang out with his friends.  She says that he always complies with her, but she can tell his heart isn't into it.  I told her that I would like to see him make a little more progress in his reading and suggested that, instead of one on one instruction, she work with him and his favorite friend together.  I'm optimistic that will help.

Otherwise, we have been keeping busy with our various activities - piano, golf, and baseball.  It's been a hectic few months.  A part of me does wonder if the breakdowns are caused in part by the fact that we have so much going on.  I constantly ask Jack if it's too much, but he wants to do it all.  I don't think I will ever have him enrolled in three activities at a time again, though.  Baseball, especially, is an enormous time commitment, although it is also the one that gives him (and us) the greatest opportunity to make new friends.  And he is making tremendous progress in all three activities.  At his last baseball game, Jack hit the ball hard enough to go out into the outfield and he got two runners out in back to back plays.  Sometimes his motivation wanes, especially when his team is on the field.  He enjoys hitting the ball, but sometimes waiting for a ball to be hit in your direction is not the most interesting thing for an energetic little boy.  He usually does pretty good stopping the ball, though.  We need to work a little more on throwing with accuracy and power.

I feel I've spent an inordinate amount of this post talking about Jack's tantrums, but really for the most part he still is a sweet and fun little boy.  I love when we are doing something that he really enjoys.  He tells me, "I love doing this.  It's like a privilege."

That's how I feel about being Jack's mommy.