Tea for two, a dream come true

Yesterday, Violet and I finally got to live out a little dream of mine.  We went to our first mother daughter tea.

Everyone knows that I am not a girly girl at all.  When I found out I was pregnant the first time, I really, really wanted a boy.  Tom and Jack really wanted the second to be a girl, but I had less of a preference either way. Of course I am so grateful that I have one of each, but I never really saw myself as someone who HAD to have a little girl.

However, I've had a secret envy over the last several years.  Starting around the time Jack was two, my mommy friends who had little girls would take their daughters to an annual mother daughter tea.  They would dress up in fancy hats and have cookies and tea at the local library that hosted the event.  I don't know why, but the idea of going to a mother daughter tea was the first time I really thought, "It would be so fun to have a little girl of my own."

Ever since Violet was born, I've kept the idea of going to this tea in the back of my mind.  I almost took her last year, but I had never done an explicitly "no boys allowed" event before.  Jack was still little enough that I think it would have hurt his feelings to not have been included, and Violet was so young that she'd never remember anyway.  I figured I'd wait one more year.

I told her about it the day before, and she couldn't stop talking about it.  She told anyone who would listen that she was going to a tea party "to-mah-yoh," which is how she pronounces "tomorrow."  If I had been more on the ball, I would have gotten us matching hats and decorated them, because this tea has a hat competition associated with it.  As it was, though, I bought the only one in Violet's size that was available at Target.  It was blue and white, and she was so excited to wear it.  We thankfully had a dress that matched.  Violet looked so sweet in her little tea party outfit.

Jack was a good sport about the whole thing.  I still felt a little guilty that he couldn't come.  Violet asked if he was going, and I told her it was for mommies and little girls only.  Jack said, "I'm fine either way.  But if I really wanted to go, would I be allowed to?"  I told him I didn't think there would be other boys there, so it probably wouldn't be much fun for him anyway.  Besides, I think it was good for him to have some one on one time with Tom.  I obviously get lots of one on one time with Violet while Jack is in school.  Different school and friend events make it so that I get alone time with Jack, while Tom watches Violet, so he gets daddy-daughter time with her as well.  But it's been a little more difficult to work in times when it's just the boys.

As we were driving to tea, Violet asked again why Jack wasn't coming.  I told her it was for mommies and daughters only.  She asked who was going to be there.  I told her that we would meet our friends, Charlotte (who is Jack's age) and her mom and grandma.  Violet said, "I'm a daughter.  I'm a little daughter.  Charlotte is a big daughter.  You're my mommy.  Are you a daughter?  Is Jack-Jack a daughter?"  We spent the rest of the car ride discussing what makes someone a daughter, a son, a mommy, and a daddy.

After so much build-up in my mind, the event itself naturally wouldn't have been able to live up to it, but it was still fun.  The ideal age for this tea is probably closer to four or five, so Violet was on the young side.  The place settings were real glass, and the guests were expected to bring them up to the food table to serve themselves buffet style.  It was somewhat nerve wracking managing all that glass.  One little girl actually did drop her cup and shatter it.   Each table was also covered with a table cloth and runner, which Violet kept getting caught on and pulling.  I had visions of her pulling the entire tablecloth along with the six glass place settings on top of it down onto the floor.  But she didn't and was a (nearly) perfect little lady.

The people who put it on did a wonderful job of decorating.  They had cookies, butter (well, margarine) and jelly sandwiches, nuts, and mints to eat and, of course, tea and punch to drink.  Each little girl was given a necklace in the shape of a glass slipper (which...ugh, but at least it wasn't real glass) as a favor.  Thankfully, Violet had no idea the literary significance of the glass slipper.  The tea only lasted about an hour, and then it was off to our next party.

I am so glad I got to share this little time with my little daughter.  I hope to make this an annual tradition for as long as she wants to do it.