Traditional New Year's post

I feel there are some years when it’s harder to maintain traditions than others. I sometimes struggle with finding the balance of knowing when to continue something or to let it go.  Traditions that we started when the children were young may or may not make sense to keep up as they get older, but sometimes it’s hard to know where that line is.

I’ve had a complicated relationship with the holidays all my life.  When I had children, I decided I wanted to make this a special time of the year for them.  To that end, we’ve participated in activities with the church and in our home that I hope are meaningful for them.  This year, however, scheduling conflicts, unforeseen circumstances, and lack of interest on my kids’ part have made it tough to fit in all our customary activities.  For me, it’s sad to see some of these traditions fall away.  On the other hand, many of these were things that the kids would have outgrown eventually anyway, and maybe I need to accept that it just happened sooner than I expected.

Some traditions I’m glad to see that we have kept are the Advent calendar, picture with Santa, and our Christmas cards.  I had always enjoyed sending and receiving Christmas cards, but I’ve found creating and sending them increasingly onerous over the years.  Each year, I debate whether this will be the year that I just don’t do it, but I have so far been able to get it done at the last minute.

All this is a long-winded way of saying that another tradition that I’ve contemplated giving up is my annual New Year’s blog post.  This blog has largely turned into a historical record of primarily Jack’s toddlerhood.  I’m grateful to have it, but I have not been great at keeping it up.  But I do enjoy the annual look back on the year that just passed and look forward to the year ahead.

Sadly, 2015 is ending on a sorrowful note.  Our sweet cat, Emmy, died this past week.  She was 19 years old, so I can feel thankful that she had a good, long life and blessed that she shared almost all of it with me.  I adopted her and her brother, Echo, when they were less than two months old.  I have lived with them for nearly half my life and longer than I’ve lived with anyone else, including my parents.  She in particular was my baby before I had babies.  There is a part of me that feels guilty that she went from being my baby to “just a cat” after I had children.  I always sensed she felt the demotion keenly.  She died while the kids and I were out of town, and it grieves me to imagine that she spent her last day wondering where we were.  She was old and battled chronic bladder infections, but there was no other indication that her time was at hand.  The surprise of it, and the fact that we weren’t home when it happened, somehow makes the loss more painful.  Part of me, though, feels this was her last gift to us: we didn’t have to find her (poor Tom had to deal with that) and we didn’t have to make the decision to put her down.  I hope she died peacefully in her sleep.  We will miss her dearly.

In some ways, I feel the year ahead will be a challenging one for our family, but I’m trying to be hopeful that good luck and good health will prevail for all our loved ones.

Highlights of the year:

* Violet started kindergarten, and Jack started third grade.
* Jack was selected to play on his league’s all-star baseball team.
* Both kids played soccer.  Jack in particular had a wonderful team.
* Violet joined a Girl Scout troop, which I somehow am co-leading.
* I ran my first two 5Ks this year.  We ran the second one as an entire family.
* Violet began piano, taiko drumming, and chess lessons; Jack started tennis lessons.  Both kids tried – and liked – ice skating for the first time.
* We’ve made amazing new friends from Jack’s sports teams and Violet’s kindergarten class.

Things to look forward to:

* We have a wedding and several milestone birthdays coming up for members of our family and extended family.  I hope that these will give the children an opportunity to see (and in some cases, meet) their relatives.
* Watching the kids explore their interests and improve their skills in various areas of their lives, whether in academics, sports, arts, or relationships.
* We don’t have any big family vacations planned (yet), but there are smaller trips that I think we may take throughout the year.

Happy New Year, everyone!