Sibling rivalry

As I mentioned, Jack is becoming less and less enamored of the idea of having a baby sister. While it's troubling overall, he does say some pretty funny things.

Jack was being particularly adorable one day, and I - foolishly, as it turns out - said to him, "Do you think Baby will be as beautiful as you?"

"No," he said. I guess I asked for that.

"Well, she'll still be beautiful, even though she might not be beautiful in the same way as you," I said.

"No, she won't."

"You don't think she'll be beautiful at all?" I asked.

"No, she won't be beautiful," he said. "Only I will be beautiful."

He still calls her "my baby," but he makes it clear that he doesn't want her. But he doesn't want anyone else to have her either. Sometimes we tease him that we'll give the baby to one of his friends if he doesn't want her, and he doesn't like that idea either.

"Don't give my baby to Malacai!" he says.

We drove past the hospital where we are going to have her yesterday, and I pointed it out to him.

"Jack," I said, "that's where Baby will be born. And then we'll take her home to live with us."

"I don't want to take my baby home."

"Well, where will she live then?"

"Not anywhere."

"Who will take care of her?"

"Not anybody."

He told me last week, "I don't want you to be my baby's mommy."

I told him, "Jack, I'll only be the mommy to one little boy - that's you - and one little girl - that's Baby."

He said, "She's not a boy, because I wanted her to be a girl."

And for all my friends who are horrified that we've never bought Jack a birthday or Christmas present, there's this conversation:

Yesterday, he also told me, "I don't like Baby."

"Jack!" I said. "That's not nice to say. Baby is our present to you." (This is what we told him early on in the pregnancy to get him excited. It worked for a little while.)

"But I already have a microwave," he said. (He received a toy microwave for his birthday, and he just loves it.)

"So, are you saying that since you have a microwave, you don't want any more presents ever again?"

"Yeah."

Maybe we should name the microwave Clara.